Don't avoid. Neutralize.

I don't read newspapers because I feel that papers focus too much on bad news. Murders, snatch thefts, politics, that kind of thing. Like most people, I prefer to keep my mind positive and happy. I believe your state of mind determines who you are.

So like most people, I've adopted the strategy of avoiding bad news. Yeah, avoiding. Pretending not to see. Looking the other way while whistling innocently. Its works most times. In the movies, I clench my eyes shut when someone is about to get gored. I shun newspapers so those horrible stories won't reach my young impressionable mind.

Except that these things pop up everywhere I go. Even on the internet. Especially on the internet. Against my better judgement, I recently read about a young woman in the US who, so incensed at a kitten that was stratching her door, shoved it into an oven and baked it to a crisp, alive. This morning I read about how 3 young men in England took a fawn (a newly born deer) and happily stomped in to death.

I'm not even going to get into the horrors of mothers killing their own babies (at least half a dozen cases in the last 3 weeks alone), children killing their own parents, and an assortment of other things that men to to each other. And these are all in "civilized" countries mind you. Notably America and Europe.

In America, the standard defense for such things is always the same. Ladies and gentlemen, this man is not a criminal. He is a victim. A victim of a materialistic, gun-loving society that has gone out of control. Society drove him to it. Society made him feel angry, guilty, whatever. It is society's fault.

Hehe. I dunno man. If people buy that shit, then they will also hold god responsible for any crime. Man is egged by society to commit a crime. Society is nature's way of group survival via a collective. God created nature. Therefore, god is the root source, the real culprit behind every screwup on earth. They had better prepare a big cell. A very, very big cell.

Anyway, coming back to this thing about keeping my mind free, happy and delightful by avoiding bad news which is everyone's favorite technique. I am realizing that it doesn't work. Avoiding my way to happiness I mean.

When I'm with happy people, I think of 3 possibilities.

• They's really happy. They have no problems at all.
• They're letting their happy feelings override their no-so-happy feelings.
• They're totally miserable but pretend to be happy lest their friends run away from them.

I think for the most part, people hang out in the second category. There is an element of ignoring cum accepting cum avoiding there. Ignoring is actually a form of avoiding. And I think you'll agree that there's only so much we can avoid. And when we can't avoid life's truths any longer, we take the hit and we pretend we didn't get hit. We learn to become fakes. At the extreme, we become delusional.

Welcome to planet earth. ^_^

No, I'm not suggesting that we go around under a cloud of doom and gloom whenever we chance upon bad news. Even I would avoid such people, hehe. ^_^ I happen to think there's a much better way to handle life's truths, and that is to learn to accept bad news as something normal and nothing to be too upset about. For me, the phrase "this too shall pass" is a useful weapon to neutralize any news, no matter how bad.

And that's my point. Instead of finding ways to avoid, learn to neutralize. Don't be angry. Neutralize. Don't be hateful. Neutralize. Don't be sad. Neutralize.

How to neutralize? By looking at something bravely in the eye and telling yourself any one of these things. Nothing is forever. This too shall pass. What goes around comes around. This is night but there will be day eventually. Let go.

I do take one extra step though. I try to understand why bad things happen. The answer depends on what you believe I guess, whether its the devil, karma, or the great juju under the sea. If I had to take a stand, I would say karma makes the most sense to me at this point, because of its close proximity to the law of physics. If you've heard of F = ma, for every action there is an equal and opposite reaction, you'll understand what I mean.

So what does accepting and neutralizing do for you? It makes you a happier person I think. Genuinely happy, not delusionally happy. (BIG diff there. One liberates you. The other grows you into a cranky old man or woman.) You spend less energy pretending. You come across to everyone as more honest and genuine. You accept that no matter how bad things are, the sun will always come up the next day.

So, be cool, be well and be happy.